My suggestions… Tell your left brain to shut up once a while (meditation is great for that) and don’t judge people because all that does is drag up all kinds of toxic memories and assumptions in your own mind – trapping you in a left brain loop.

Oh, and remember: your money or your life!

Steve, I checked out your blog entry on the topic. Very thought provoking.

Tracey, I am an engineer by background. It was this training that had me realize that we can engineer businesses and bridges, but you can’t engineer people. And you certainly can’t engineer your way to happiness.

Rebecca, I do agree this is a normal progression. And by giving it a name and distinguishing the concept, you can be aware of it in advance. This may enable you avoid it altogether. If not, at least you can be comforted in knowing that it is natual and common – and not something to worry about.

Thanks again everyone.

Thanks again for

Hugely worthwhile and meaningful post. And, the phenom is actually predictable.

While working with some clients who were experiencing similar struggles, I started looking for research and diagnostic tools that could be helpful. (Some people just need to see the data!)

Lo and behold, I was introduced to a researcher on the west coast who had put together medical, psychological, and value-oriented information that gave a clear explanation of why this happens at certain times. So here’s the Readers’s Digest version:

Up until about the age of 30 (it varies), we have unbridled energy that allows us to pretty much succeed at whatever we are doing. We can work long hours AND societal norms support the ok-ness of doing that to “get one’s career off the ground.”

In our 30′s, our physical energy starts to wane. That prompts us to say “Hey, why am I doing ____?” And we start looking for congruency.

The fact of the physiological matter is, we’re dying (sorry about the downer). And we start looking for meaning.

This happens a couple of more times, too. What I have discovered is this: by the age of about 55 people–usually males–either become “bitter” or “better.” They either integrate and reconcile their existence or decide that life has dealt them a bad hand.

Hats off to Jeremy for wanting to do the work and surrounding himself with advisors for help and accountability.

When I read Shapiro’s article in Oprah’s magazine promoting the book “Goalfree Living”, it confirmed what I knew while working at one of the top management consulting firms in the world. Life is not linear or to be treated like a commodity. Companies promote these practices in order to produce widgets and make money. I recognize this after 15 years in the work world.

As a result, I’ve stopped bringing a lot their theories into my personal life. I’m a project manager who is extremely analytical and methodical and made the mistake of integrating a lot of their principles into my life. Being more efficient, methodical, and effective in my personal life made me miserable even though I was effective. I was focusing on building “to-do lists” and checking stuff off instead of living in the moment to build real relationships and create memorable moments.